Couples Therapy Kendal

By  Supernanny Team 18/10/2007

Sadly, miscarriages – the spontaneous loss of a baby – happen, and often. They can also happen to anyone, but unfortunately, women may feel a sense of failure, guilt, or even shame, when they have one. Women who have suffered a miscarriage often have a lot of questions to ask, and are in need of strong emotional support. But the bottom line is that they need to know they can get through it.

It’s horribly common,” says Ruth Bender Atik, Director of the Miscarriage Association. “But often women don’t find that out until they’ve had one. Then, suddenly, other people tell them that they went through it too.

When do miscarriages happen?

Most miscarriages occur in the first three months of pregnancy - but they can happen up to the 24th week. Pregnancy loss after 24 weeks is known as stillbirth.

Physically there is obviously a huge difference between a miscarriage at seven weeks or one at 20 weeks, but the feelings of loss can be the same.

“The emotional experience doesn’t always tie in with the gestation,” says Ruth Bender Atik, “True, the physical experience is very different, but emotionally, it may be very similar.”

Why do miscarriages happen?

Any woman who is at risk of pregnancy is also at risk of miscarriage. But what’s important to remember is that your miscarriage is unlikely to have happened because of anything you did or didn’t do.

After suffering a miscarriage, many women (and their partners) will be desperate to find out just why it happened. They may blame themselves, or think that they did everything “right” and yet still suffered.

But it is usually very difficult to know the cause of a miscarriage, and unless you have, unfortunately, suffered from three or more losses (known as “recurrent” miscarriages), the medical services may not carry out investigations.

The main causes of miscarriage are thought to be:

• Genetic – the baby does not develop normally, and cannot survive.
• Hormonal – women with very irregular periods may find it harder to conceive in the first place, and are more likely to miscarry when they do.
• Immunological – problems within the blood vessels which supply the placenta can lead to miscarriage.
• Infection – some illnesses or infections (such as Rubella - ‘German’ measles) can lead to miscarriage.
• Anatomical – if the cervix is weak, this may start to open once the uterus becomes heavier in later pregnancy. An irregular shaped uterus can mean there isn’t enough room for the baby to grow.

There has also been some recent research suggesting that underweight women are at a greater risk of early miscarriage. However, the new research also suggested that the risk can be reduced by taking supplements (particularly folic acid) and eating fresh fruit and vegetables.

What can I do?

Even after several miscarriages, most women have a good chance of a successful pregnancy, but that may not help you if you have just suffered one. You may feel depressed, g...

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